Mirror, mirror on the wall...
It is not uncommon to hear girls in the restrooms complaining about their looks.
"Oh my God, I think I gained the freshman fifteen. I look so fat now."
"I wish my boobs were bigger."
"My nose looks like one big mess."
But what happens when these thoughts are all these girls can think of when they look into the mirror? And girls, you are not the only one who can feel these way. Some men do too.
If these thoughts are plaguing your brain whenever you see yourself in the mirror; if catching a reflection of yourself in the shop windows causes you to want to look away from the sight; if everyone around you is telling you you don't look bad but you still feel that you look ugly or that some part of your body just isn't good enough; if you have already gone for plastic surgery so many times yet feel that a body part is too ugly;
You could have BODY DYSMORPHIC DISORDER.
What is Body Dysmorphic Disorder?
Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD) is considered a mental illness whereby a person experiences excessive preoccupation with their body image or preconceived physical defect. This obsession with thinking that there is something wrong with their bodies could harm their social, work and family life. It is not uncommon for these people to eventually, as their disorder gains more momentum over time, to withdraw from other people and society altogether.
Sufferers of BDD tend to have low self-esteem, high levels of anxiety, depression and may sometimes come up with extreme behaviour to cope with BDD.
- They could refuse to leave the house.
- Walk around with sunglasses, scarves, face masks etc.
- Their houses have no objects that could have a reflective surface.
- They do not attend social functions.
- They spend hours in front of the mirror picking out the flaws in their bodies.
The list above is not exhaustive. These behaviors could start out as just something that they do once a day or less. But as the disorder grows, it soon turns into an obsession, a need, something they have to do just to function normally.
If you can relate to the above scenarios, here are some steps that you may want to take; it may save your life.
Talk To Someone
Find someone to talk to immediately. If you find that there is nothing wrong with you mentally and all you think is wrong with you is your physical defect, talk to someone too. You have to understand that other people (normally, when you don't already lock yourself away from them) tend to see more of you than you see yourself. Our eyes are all pointing forwards looking outwards from our heads, so we are made to look at others not at ourselves. By getting a second or third or fourth or even more opinion, it would be more accurate than relying on one opinion (yourself) which could be wrong on its own in the first place. This is why people do surveys, to get a more accurate finding.
Try To Accept That You Have A Problem
Humans are social creatures and shunning society is not what we are programmed to do. If you find yourself doing that you have to admit that there is a problem. Admitting that there is a problem would be the first step on the road to recovery. You have to see or yourself that the thing that has to be changed is not your poor nose that is close to collapsing after the multiple cosmetic surgeries it has undergone, it is your mentality that is the one that needs to be changed.
Where Did It Come From?
Such thoughts are usually triggered from events that happened
before. It could be something someone said, a traumatic life experience, a phase in life that you feel you never grew out of etc. It would be good if you could pin-point when such thoughts first started coming into your head
because when you know what triggered this to happen, the possibility of
looking back at the event and facing it to get rid of it is that much
higher.
However, if you have no idea at all as to how or why this started, it's alright.
Seek Professional Help
When you have come to the conclusion that it is a problem, of course the next step is wanting to solve it. Seek professional assistance. It can be in the course of a therapist, counselor or psychiatrist. And once you are on a journey, please go through with it and not quit halfway because you want to get better, you have to get better and you need to get better.
Personally...
I feel that you are in control of your life. What you see in the mirror isn't as important as how you see the reflection. You don't need to have a symmetrical face with a high-bridged nose, perfectly formed lips and an oval face to look good. Be confident in yourself because you are a fighter to be able to live for the number of years that you have lived on this Earth.
I'm not saying that you should live in self-denial if something is really, medically proven, wrong. If the weighing machine and doctors issue you stern warnings that what you are doing is detrimental to your health, then do something about it.
But always do things in moderation.
You don't have to be stick thin to be beautiful, but that doesn't mean that even when your doctor tells you that your arteries are in danger of clogging themselves out, you don't do anything either.
Health is more important than beauty. What good would a silicon doll be to this world? And that could be what you would be if the obsession took over your life and caused your death.
I would love to hear what people have to say about this topic. please feel free to comment :) And I hope all of you live happy and healthy and self-fulfilling lives.
Love,
MM
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